Tag Archives: it takes a village

Sep29

We are losing our children…

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We are losing our children…

We are losing our children. They didn’t get lost on their own. They turned down side streets and took back alleys looking for the way home. We weren’t there to turn on the porch light, to let them know we were still there, so now they’re lost. They wander the cruelty of this world, this place we build and abandon daily, searching for home among the monuments to ego we created. Looking for meaning in the things we hold so dear, the things we build for ‘the man’ and turn around and buy from ‘the man’ with money on loan from ‘the man’. It’s not there. Instead of finding that meaning, our children lay wasted and forgotten. The unfulfilled potential withers away in bodies that are stretching, straining, waiting to be understood. Waiting for love, while we watch ‘Real Chance of Love’. Waiting for someone to wipe tears, while we wipe down our new cars. Waiting for quality time, while we work overtime. And we mean well. We want to give our children a better life, but in the process we’ve forgotten to teach them how to live.


They throw fits. They act out. Ever seen a lost child? They show out until Mama comes running. But what if Mama never comes? Daddy never comes? Auntie and Uncle won’t come? Grannie and Big Papa can’t come? What to do? Baby gotta keep trying until someone listens, until someone hears a cry. We can’t pretend not to hear our children crying any longer.


What’s the reality? Some of us don’t know how to live. We were never taught. We feel ill-equipped to face the youth that so desperately need us because we were left to learn it all on our own. So we leave them to figure it out. Work it out. Fight their way out. The stakes are higher today than ever before. We can’t let our children fight their way out any more, because they are losing. All over this country, they are fighting a losing war against one another because they don’t understand that they are on the same side. They are fighting a losing war against themselves because they haven’t learned to value themselves over material things and their souls over foolish pride. And we haven’t learned it all yet, but we have to trust the Almighty to inure us with the knowledge and the courage to guide our children. That’s the only way.


We are losing our children, but it’s not too late. If you saw a child running into a busy street, you’d do all you could to snatch them back onto the curb. This is one and the same. We teach, though we aren’t all teachers. We parent, though we aren’t all parents. If we chose to guide, we will be given divine instructions. But we have to make the choice and we have to make it now. The true legacy of our days is not in the land we own nor the money we have in the bank, but it is in our children. We cannot afford to let them lose their way.

Jul14

Seeds

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Seeds

We call our children our seeds and I think most people get that analogy. But on another level, dealing with kids is like farming. You start with a little seed and hopefully you grow something healthy and fruitful. That’s how it’s supposed to go, right?

Some kids are like oregano. Plant oregano and you get immediate gratification. Little water, some sun and pretty soon you see some action. As a matter of fact, once herbs start growing, you can see some progress everyday. And you feel like you’re doing something. Some kids just don’t take a lot of work. They need some attention, some guidance and some love, but they’re hardwired to make it happen. That’s good too, because some kids are like potatoes. Potatoes are a whole different ballgame.

When you plant a seed potato, you’re not going to see anything for a long time. The work occurs underground, for the most part. If you want a good potato, it can’t push out and be exposed directly to the light – it can’t take all that light at once. You have to hill them, make sure they are covered in soil. And they need the sunlight and the water and some weeding. It takes a lot for potatoes and there is no instant gratification. You see leaf action, but you want potatoes. You have to wait. You just have to trust that what you’re doing is working.

Some kids are like that. They take a lot work. You love them, support them, help them, teach them, care for them. And you don’t see anything. It’s a little disheartening. You have to keep on tending to them, because the work is happening underneath. They run from you and act up because they can’t take all the light you’re trying to expose them to. You think they aren’t listening, but they are. So you give them what they need, a little at a time. Eventually, there will be results. It might take a really long time. You might not ever personally see the results, but that doesn’t mean they won’t be successful. And they’ll always remember who took the time to tend them.

Our children, our seeds, need us to help them grow. We sow the seeds and we have to take the time to tend them.

May26

The Exodus

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The Exodus

Today was kind of sad. I had another student withdraw. I’ve had no less than 4 students withdraw in the last week to enroll in private school. They can’t pass the TAKS test. (TAKS is a standardized test here in Texas. If students don’t pass all sections before the end of their senior year, they can’t graduate.)

I get it. We have to have some measure. The kids should be able to pass the test. (Well, that’s arguable.) But you haven’t seen their faces. You don’t know how miserable these kids are after attempting a test 5 times, not passing it and being faced with not graduating from High School no matter how well they’ve done in class. It’s a heartbreaking moment.

The alternative is private schools, but not any private schools. These are pretty much diploma mills. Most of them only have classes 2 days a week. I signed withdrawl papers for a girl today; she graduates from the private school next week. She will have attended 3 days of school.

Students who are economically disadvantaged and/or minority are most affected by the whole thing. The people who can least afford to pay for an alternative school and most need a high school diploma are the ones who get shafted in the end. You aren’t suprised, are you? Tuition costs more the closer to the end of the year, despite the fact that the kids will only be there for a few days, because parents and kids are desperate. So either you pony up the money (if you can) or you don’t get a diploma from anywhere. No child left behind…if you can afford it.

Our kids shouldn’t be reduced to this. This is a fun part of the year, as I teach seniors. It’s also the saddest part of the year for me, because I know we failed those kids. You shouldn’t have to go pay nearly $1,000 to enroll in a private school for 3 days to get a diploma in the rec room of a community center. You shouldn’t be studying for a GED after 12 years of school. If they’ve passed their classes, those kids should be at graduation, walking across the stage with their classmates.

But they won’t.