i know there’s not long left
we’re getting older
time is getting shorter
and he won’t be alone
forever
this tv will keep me busy
while i try not to think about
the inevitable
how one day, someday
i’ll see him somewhere
and he’ll show me a picture of:
his wife
his baby
his new life
and i will smile
stifle my heart
and say ohmygoshthatssogreatimsohappyforyou
and on some level
i’ll mean it
because he’s all i love

i know there’s not long left
i’m prepared, i think
i know that our time has passed
and since he never knew we had time
that fact will go unnoticed
i’m in bed with a headache
he’s at a party, probably meeting
the new her
i’m being dramatic
overreacting
grasping for anything that might
make me whole again
but i hope he finds her
maybe even tonight
and on some level
i mean it
because he’s all i love.